Every man, young and old, in today’s society is expected to hide all kinds of vulnerability, exercising strength, self-sufficiency, and emotional repression. The society applauds them for hiding their pain, keeping their internal struggles to themselves, and prioritizing others’ needs.

However, this strength and expectations come at a price, ranging from serious undiagnosed sicknesses to critical mental issues left untreated. Men are battling serious issues, yet society has turned a blind eye towards them.

According to Dr Adedotun Olutunmise Oyewole, a medical professional and founder of TheStillWaters Mental Health Foundation, the most common health issues affecting men today in Nigeria include “mental health, reproductive health issues like infertility, erectile dysfunction, sexually transmitted infection, and prostate cancer, which is a significant concern amongst men, especially amongst the older men.”

Many men only seek medical help when they have a serious health challenge. Regular check-ups, screening, and treatments are often ignored because men believe they can overcome whatever health challenge they have within a matter of time. What many do not know is that, at times, the silent symptoms are what develop into life-threatening cases.

When asked why many men delay in seeking medical care, Dr Oyewole highlighted three major reasons, which are “masculinity expectations that put pressure on them to always appear strong and resilient; avoidance of potential health issues, which is the fear of diagnosis; and lack of symptoms.”

Culturally, men are built to talk less about stress, depression, and anxiety. They are expected to be fine and not show any form of weakness, which often leads to disasters in their homes and in society. “Societal expectations discourage help-seeking; more men commit suicide than women. The society permits women to reach out for care while men are expected to be strong”, said Dr. Oyewole.

He further stated that people who come to the foundation for medical care are mainly females. “Even from my foundation, people who reach out most times for mental health care are mainly females; only a few times have we had males reach out.”

Emphasizing the wider challenge of silenced vulnerability in men, the doctor stressed that men are often advised to take risks. “Men are encouraged to have behaviors that compromise their health,” quoting the general belief, “You are a man, that’s how a man should do it, that’s how your grandfather did it.”

All of these connotations can bring strong societal expectations, which eventually affect men’s mental and physical health. One of our respondents, Mozeed Olabisi, a man in his late 20s, shared, “Society views men as machines, forgetting that machines also break down at times. Society doesn’t even believe that men break down, so if at all a man breaks down, the society wants the guy to deal with it alone without creating any drama about it.

When asked if he has ever avoided seeing a doctor, he said, “I do avoid seeing doctors for two main reasons, which are: the society’s perception of my gender, because people feel breaking down as a male is a big turn off, and also the fear of encountering another hidden sickness in my body.”

Another respondent, who spoke on condition of anonymity, shared his opinion on whether men talk about their mental health. He said, “No, men do not talk about their mental health enough because most men find it complicated to disclose. Most men will rather take business or means of surviving as a priority, which I am an example.”

The above statement reflects the silent struggles most men face: the pressure to be fine when they are not fine; the pressure to be strong when they are vulnerable, and the fear of the unknown, keeping them from seeking medical help when it is needed.

Awareness campaigns and measures targeted at addressing the physical and mental challenges men face are few compared to the campaigns focusing on women. Initiatives targeted at men often receive less attention and awareness.

Oyewole, the medical professional and NGO founder further stated that “while there are some campaigns, more efforts need to be made to scale up initiatives and engage communities. Men-focused awareness campaigns are nothing compared to the women’s, and this is one of the things affecting the health-seeking behavior of men because there’s more focus on the female gender, and more needs to be done intentionally, either by non-governmental initiatives or the government.

He noted that some initiatives that prioritize men’s mental health and physical health include the Men’s Stay Alive Project, the Nigerian Association for Improvement of Mental Health, and the Lagos State Mental Health Program; however, many men are still disconnected from them due to deep cultural norms, stigma, and fear.

Speaking on measures that can be taken to encourage men to prioritize their health, he emphasized that there should be more men-led initiatives. “We need to have initiatives being led by men, have them share their health experiences to encourage other men. Also, we need to have workplace programmes that will integrate health services and education into workplaces. Men are always at the workplace most of the time. Using media campaigns to promote health programmes will also be highly beneficiary”.

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Oyewole further called on the government to promote health education by integrating men’s health into the school curriculum, and increase accessibility by providing affordable male-friendly health care services.

Efforts has to be made in challenging societal norms by encouraging open discussions about men’s health and emotions.

A healthy society requires adequate health arrangements for both genders. This is why care for women must go hand in hand with care for women, through initiatives that encourage openness, and diminishes established cultural norms that place unrealistic responsibilities on the male gender.